Snippets of Serendipity

August 20, 2005

Stuck

Filed under: Pieces of Me —— myownprivateserendipity @ 4:54 am

Ever had that feeling that you’re just so STUCK because you’re in a situation thats totally frustrating but you just CAN’T seem to do anything about it? I know… you might say there’s always a solution to every problem..but what if the solution is sure to cause someone that’s dear to you a lot of hurt and pain?
Ok, ok, I know by now you might be shaking your head and thinking.. (what the hell is this person talking about??)…well, you might call it the rantings of a single female in a society where everybody expects you to be with someone. And if this ain’t so, then there must be something terribly wrong with you..tsk, tsk, tsk.
Quarter-life crisis, maybe? Hmmm…it’s possible. It’s just that you get to that point where you just want to stop overanalyzing and intellectualizing the situation you’re in, trying to find answers to your never-ending why’s, and just be honest with yourself. Why AM I not with someone? And I’t has just recently dawned on me that the simplest answers are sometimes the hardest to digest.
But it is not that simple to face the reality of rejection, especially when you’ve had little experience of the feeling during your years of existence.

I know my problem is hardly earth-shattering in magnitude. I know eventually, things will work out. But for now, just bear with me, folks. I just have to share this and get the thoughts outta my head, or risk the long-term effects of God -knows -what- kind of mental disease it might bring.. And if anyone of you out there has something enlightening to share with me with this situation I find myself in, it will be more than welcome.

August 15, 2005

Intellectualization

Filed under: Uncategorized —— myownprivateserendipity @ 6:19 am

Intellectualization: the rational, practical method by which I try to defend my actions as products of a logical, thinking, brain. Or so I think so. Mind over heart??? Maybe. Sourgraping? Most likely. What you can’t have, you try to reason with yourself on why it’s better NOT to have it. I just wish it were so simple. Call it as living 27 years under strict supervision. When the situation calls for me to think out of the box, I am scared shitless.

Maybe time will be on my side, or maybe not. What fate has in store for me, I am eager to know. In the meantime, I shall wait.

Filed under: Uncategorized —— myownprivateserendipity @ 5:56 am

Fix You by Coldplay

When you try your best, but you don’t succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can’t sleep
Stuck in reverse
When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can’t replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

High up above or down below
When you too in love to let it go
If you never try you’ll never know
Just what you’re worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Friend

August 3, 2005

The American Dream

Filed under: Pieces of Me —— myownprivateserendipity @ 3:47 am

FlagAs a physical therapist, I am one of those who dreams of having a career in the United States. And slowly, with God’s grace, I am finally realizing it. Going through the bloody, stressful task of getting there, I came across this e-mail. And it struck me that this was exactly how I feel about leaving. I am dreaming the American dream, but I want to wake up and be home. This will still be home. Here. No matter what.

Pinay wins it big in London

By Alfred Yuson

The Philippine Star 05/16/2004

Patricia Evangelista, a 19-year- old, Mass Communications sophomore
of University of the Philippines (UP)-Diliman, did the country proud
Friday night by besting 59 other student contestants from 37
countries in the 2004 International Public Speaking competition
conducted by the English Speaking Union (ESU) in London.

She triumphed over a field of exactly 60 speakers from all over the
English-speaking world, including the United States, United Kingdom
and Australia, reported Maranan.

The board of judges’ decision was unanim ous, according to contest
chairman Brian Hanharan of the British broadcasting Corp. (BBC).

PATRICIA’S SHORT SPEECH WORTH READING….

———————————————————

BLONDE AND BLUE EYES

When I was little, I wanted what many Filipino children all over the
country wanted. I wanted to be blond, blue-eyed, and white.

I thought — if I just wished hard enough and was good enough, I’d
wake upon Christmas morning with snow outside my window and freckles
across my nose!

More than four centuries under western domination does that to you.
I have sixteen cousins. In a couple of years, there will just be
five of us left in the Philippines, the rest will have gone abroad
in search of "greener pastures." It’s not just an anomaly; it’s a
trend; the Filipino diaspora. Today, about eight million Filipinos
are scattered around the world.

There are those who disapprove of Filipinos who choose to leave. I
used to. Maybe this is a natural reaction of someone who was left
behind, smiling for family pictures that get emptier with each
succeeding year. Desertion, I called it. My country is a land that
has perpetually fought for the freedom to be itself. Our heroes
offered their lives in the struggle against the Spanish, the
Japanese, the Americans. To pack up and deny that identity is
tantamount to spitting on that sacrifice.

Or is it? I don’t think so, not anymore. True, there is no denying
this phenomenon, aided by the fact that what was once the other side
of the world is now a twelve-hour plane ride away. But this is a
borderless world, where no individual can claim to be purely from
where he is now. My mother is of Chinese descent, my father is a
quarter Spanish, and I call myself a pure Filipino-a hybrid of sorts
resulting from a combination of cultures.

Each square mile anywhere in the world is made up of people of
different ethnicities, with national identities and individ ual
personalities. because of this, each square mile is already a
microcosm of the world. In as much as this blessed spot that is
England is the world, so is my neighborhood back home.

Seen this way, the Filipino Diaspora, or any sort of dispersal of
populations, is not as ominous as so many claim. It must be
understood. I come from a Third World country, one that is still
trying mightily to get back on its feet after many years of
dictatorship. But we shall make it, given more time. Especially now,
when we have thousands of eager young minds who graduate from
college every year. They have skills. They need jobs. We cannot
absorb them all.

A borderless world presents a bigger opportunity, yet one that is
not so much abandonment but an extension of identity . Even as we
take, we give back. We are the 40,000 skilled nurses who support the
UK’s National Health Service. We are the quarter-of-a-million
seafarers manning most of the world’s commercial ships. We are your
software engineers in Ireland, your construction workers in the
Middle East, your doctors and caregivers in North America, and, your
musical artists in London’s West End.

Nationalism isn’t bound by time or place. People from other nations
migrate to create new nations, yet still remain essentially who they
are. British society is itself an example of a multi-cultural
nation, a melting pot of races, religions, arts and cultures. We
are, indeed, in a borderless world!

Leaving sometimes isn’t a matter of choice. It’s coming back that
is. The Hobbits of the shire travelled all over Middle-Earth, but
they chose to come home, richer in every sense of the word. We call
people like these balikbayans or the ‘returnees’ — those who
followed their dream, yet choose to return and share their mature
talents and good fortune.

In a few years, I may take advantage of whatever opportunities come
my way. But I will come home. A borderless world doesn’t preclude
the idea o f a home. I’m a Filipino, and I’ll always be one. It
isn’t about just geography; it isn’t about boundaries. It’s about
giving back to the country that shaped me.

And that’s going to be more important to me than seeing snow outside
my windows on a bright Christmas morning.

Mabuhay and Thank you.

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